MANSUITE

To infinity, and beyond!

2011-07-28T12:08:00.003-04:00

Mansuite Men Jordan Keenan and Jon Battat teamed up for a phenomenal article for Motherboard on the future of the space industry. Check it out!

The article: http://www.motherboard.tv/2011/7/27/american-kisses-spacecraft-monogamy-goodbye

Save the Date

2011-06-15T13:07:00.004-04:00

To celebrate the memory of Mansuite and the ideals of food and friendship that all lovers of Mansuite share, I propose a reunion the weekend of September the 6th, 2013, five years from the time the Mansuite began.

If you're dedicated enough to be reading this, you're invited.

Shop at Lowe's!

2010-05-28T18:20:00.001-04:00

Mansuite and friends go to Mammoth

2010-01-24T16:06:00.006-05:00

"Hey Michael, wake up!"

"Mrrpphm..not now."

"C'mon Michael, come play with me!"

"Go away California! It's too cold to leave bed."

"Get up! It's going to be a great day! First we can hang out in the sun, and go to the beach..."

"Shhhh. Shhhh. I'm enjoying my New England wintry mix and frozen streets."

"...and then after the beach we can go sailing, and then after sailing it's going to snow six feet and then..."

"Wait, what did you just say about six feet?"

And thus began a cross-country (and cross-continent for some) adventure to bask in the paradise called California.

We rented a tiny condo over New Year's and crammed in more people than recommended by CDC pandemic guidelines, not to mention the policy of the condo owners.

As it turned out, the only contagion breaking out and spreading like wildfire was dance parties

We spent most of our days alternating between sitting around

and careening down mountains to our almost-doom

Despite our best efforts, everybody survived, so it looks like we'll just have to go back and do it again.

Other highlights:

We started a band. So far all we have is the cover art, but that's all you need nowadays, right?

If you missed out, don't worry: We're definitely doing it again.

6:23 pm edit: I thought this might make an interesting comparison:

This is why I'm in France

2010-01-07T14:54:00.003-05:00

The update is that I'm at extended space camp in France. The important part is this:

I made a 3 mushroom soup tonight*.
it was really good
it had leeks, carrots and shallots to make up a vegetable stock.

Then i sauteed 3 types of mushroom:

Crimini Mushrooms (delicious and familiar):

Chanterelles Mushrooms (succulent and exotic):

Trumpets of Death (dark, mysterious, expensive, fragrant, rich, evil):

I failed to take a picture of the soup but it was delicious.

*This was a few weeks ago back in early December. But it captures the spirit of my enthusiasm.

A MANLY MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM THE GRAND CANYON

2010-01-04T23:37:00.009-05:00

I even found a reindeer! Naturally, I named him Kolin the Raindear (featured below).

Kolin and I made a snowman.

And then went hiking into the Kanyon..

Kolin took this photo of my shadow.

I'm also taking the liberty of pasting an entirely random photo below:

FIN.

Miss u, men. Write soon.

The beginning of the night I didn't remember

2009-11-02T16:32:00.000-05:00

Colin went as Charlie from Always Sunny, complete with Riot Juice that
proved to be both of our downfalls.

Missing Photo!

2009-10-13T16:58:00.002-04:00

WOAH, I don't think we ever snapped a shot of our secret Mansuite squares behind the bathroom door (!?!??!) A beer on me to whoever (Mansuite or not) can first get a photo of these bi-colored quadrilateral remnants of manly nirvana that was EC H1006 2008-2009 to the following address:

winstoncb@gmail.com

Mansuite lives

2009-09-28T15:21:00.004-04:00

Like one of those flatworms which you cut apart in 8th grade science class and then somehow all the pieces you butchered remained alive and began to regrow into individual worming wormy things--that's the parable of mansuite's members.

Summer is over. One year ago to this date we were crashing over the rips in a small motorboat off the coast of Cape May, NJ. Now we may all be in separate boats, but we all exist on the same sea--the sea of life. And before this gets any more corny, a recap of what all of us are doing.

Jon--Couldn't get enough of beautiful California, and despite all his pleadings, he unfortunately was torn away and forced to march onwards to France, since he had already paid astronaut tuition and they'll be damned if he's not getting on that spaceship now.

Tom--Got tired of his morning-til-night backbreaking internship of laying bricks in Switzerland and built a robot who will do it for him. The robot is coming to New York to lay bricks in an exhibit there. He now returns to Philadelphia for a Salabol selling marathon.

Winston--Packed up his belongings, caulked the wagon, forded the river and headed for the desert. Nobody has heard from him since.

Jordan--Surfed and lounged in the sun for 10 weeks straight in Papa New Guinea. On the last day he wrote an 8 page paper (double-spaced, 1.5 inch margins) about surf culture in paradise, thus fulfilling his obligations as an anthropology major. He heads to Australia now to hope to do it again.

Colin--Began his acting career running puppet shows in small-town Minnesota. Soon he was discovered and began featuring in independent films in the area. Now he is big-time living in New York and becoming a star. And it only took 8 weeks!

Michael--Picked a name out of a hat and moved to Boston randomly. He deletes porn for a living and basically deals with the 9-to-5 drudgery of life. He also wrote an ebook and learned that his website will rank higher in search listings if it has other websites linking to it. The book is a resource to help prepare students for succeeding on their exams and the website is http://www.examstudytips.com . Putting that link here may or may not have been the entire reason for writing this post.

The Beginning of a New Chapter

2009-05-22T00:19:00.003-04:00

Whitewashed, dismantled, disfigured, H1006 has regressed to its primitive, sterile, initial state. But infused within two particularly colorful hidden squares, all of the memories persist (picture to come).

VIVE LA MANSUITE

Yes we know!

2009-05-18T01:31:00.002-04:00

Here's the plan for SEAS class day tomorrow morning.

Order of Events
-Procession
-Welcome Remarks
-Salutatory Remarks
-President Bollinger’s Remarks
-Presentation of the Class Gift by Senior Fund
-Dean Navratil’s Remarks and Presentation of Faculty Awards
-Alumni Remarks and Presentation of Faculty Teaching Awards
-Presentation of Student Awards and Prizes
-Valedictory Remarks
-Keynote Speaker Remarks
-Class President’s Remarks
-Reading of the Names and Presentation of Class Pins (Give your name card to the Advising Dean stationed to the right of the stage. You will then process across the stage to be congratulated by the Dean and the President, and to receive your class pin. Please return to your seat for the remainder of the ceremony.)
-Singing of Stand Colombia and Roar, Lion, Roar
-Recession

Men of letters

2009-05-14T19:47:00.000-04:00

We will soon be them, so we'd better start acting like them.

Study break, extreme edition

2009-05-10T22:19:00.003-04:00

A couple of us felt like we had been studying for too long on Friday, so we decided to take a little study break. No, this wasn't cupcakes on the Lerner ramp or an a capella concert; we had something a little more exciting in store for our weekend.

Saturday, 7:45am: Load skis in car, depart Lyme, NH

8:50am: Stop for Andrew to pee.

10:55am: Arrive Pekham's notch, Mt. Washington, NH 103 miles later.

11:15am: Gear up for the trail.

1:20pm: Arrive at base of Tuckerman's ravine, 2 miles and 1700 feet later.

1:34pm: While booting up at rocks at base run, watch a bloodied man with a broken nose tumble 800 feet to our location.

1:35pm: Scream for medic.

1:36pm: Have doubts about whether this is a good idea.

1:45pm: Begin ascent

1:49pm: Andrew: "Is this going to be one those times I regret following you, MC?"

2:35pm: Arrive at top of ravine, 1200 feet later, witness house-sized chuck of ice crack off on opposite wall and crash down to the Lunch Rocks.

2:39pm: Look down near-vertical cornice at top of headwall. Feel like vomiting and defecating simultaneously.

2:41pm: Telemarker suiting up at the top: "You climb up here over those icy rocks, you see avalanches and ice crash down over out there, you look down at this huge expanse of mountain and get the sensation of it all being really epic. Don't let the mountain get to you, at the end of the day-- it's just fucking skiing."

2:44pm: Jump off first. Enter couloir.

2:45:36pm: Exit couloir.

2:46pm: Reaffirm value of living. Relegate stresses of life within larger perspective of the everlasting universe of the sublimity of infinite nature.

2:47pm: Decide to do it again.

2:48pm: Watch Andrew charge down.

2:52pm: Watch George lose an edge entering the hourglass. Watch George slide towards rocky precipice. Watch George get caught by mercy of the bushes on the outcropping.

2:53pm: Hike up to retrieve his equipment.

3:01pm: Make George film me skiing out partway out of couloir into bowl.

3:02pm: See sky. See snow. See sky. See snow. See sky. See snow. See snow. Evaluate body diagnostics.

3:04pm: Recover only to see George lose balance and fall right at me. Jump out of way at last second.

[3:04pm at ravine floor as related by Andrew: Become the laughing stock of the lunch crowd at our Marx brothers routine.]

3:10pm: Hike up and make George film attempt two.

4:15pm: Hike out to car with everybody relatively intact.

5:15pm: Arrive at parking lot right as torrential downpour begins.

5:25pm: Pull off road to permit rain to pass.

7:42pm: Stop at Wal-Mart to let George get flowers for mother's day.

8:15pm: Arrive at driveway, nearly drive over downed live power lines across driveway. Save everybody's life by shouting.

8:17pm Pick way around downed power lines, encounter 5 blown-down trees on driveway and destruction at the house. George becomes severely frustrated.

9:10pm: Begin chainsawing trees.

10:45pm: Finish chainsawing and hauling. Get beer and enter hot tub. Sweet, merciful hot tub.

Needless to say, we didn't get back until Sunday. 1200 miles of driving, 6 miles of hiking and 7000 feet elevation change, all for 1 minute and 30 seconds of bliss. Can we consider it a "ski day"?

Prioritizing

2009-05-07T15:07:00.002-04:00

Nothing like a monsoon-scale rainstorm to help you prioritize your studying.

And nothing like an extra couple of warm bodies to make the shower better:

Colin is king!

2009-05-05T20:48:00.001-04:00

On Quigly's throne.

And I declare myself king of this blog because nobody posts anymore.

Relevant to my Interests

2009-05-02T14:46:00.003-04:00

Thank you google adsense, for your deft insights into my consumer purchasing habits:

Contrary to popular belief, you can actually click on photos to make them larger

The Roman Forum! A Chance to Learn

2009-05-01T11:48:00.002-04:00

Today, we are talking about the ancient Roman Forum, the core of the thriving republican and imperial city that once stood at the center of the entire universe. Some, of course, may argue that it still does, but the city we will be talking about today--that of 2000 years ago--certainly did.

Today's lecture will focus on the Roman Forum! The Roman Forum, nestled in between three of the seven original hills of Rome--the Capitoline, Palatine, and Esquline--was the center for all public matters. It contained architectural and public spaces that supported political, religious, economic, judicial, and honorary social functions. As such, the forum grew to be an incredibly diverse space characterized by an equally diverse set of new architectural inventions. The ruins we can see now mark the physical footprint left by the values and principles of an incredibly complex ancient world, one that marked the beginnings of much of the western values and systems we know today. The forum, even in its crumbled state, challenges us to imagine how so many of our contemporary social practices were in fact built into a world that thrived so long ago.

Plan of the Forum. The Black dots represent columns.

So, what did this place look like? Good question. The earliest developments of the forum occurred around VI-V BC, when the first urbanization came to the cradle in between the three hills. During this early stage Via Saccra, the road that slices through the forum to this day, was planned and mapped. The Palatine Hill to the south, which is now marked primarily by the ruins of a much later Imperial palace, was populated by Etruscan style homes during this early stage of civic development. The presence of residential architecture at this early stage marks the primitive level of Roman development at this time; the population was small and centralized, with the earliest inhabitants living on the land that would later become solely public and imperial space.

This cornice once stood 75 feet in the air--maybe even higher, but it still had to be perfect.

Things start to get really interesting in the forum during the republican revolution. Political functions are decentralized, ushering in the separation of the senate, the rostra, and comitium, and the basilica. Now, what were these things? Great question. The senate was, of course, the meeting place for magistrates. It took the form of the curia, the senate building located at the northwest corner of the Via Saccra. Then we have the rostra, the stage like platform where orators would address the public. Originally it was attached to the curia, but it was moved to the center of forum in years later. Finally, we have the basilica, which served a diverse set of functions. The basilicas worked as a meeting place where financial transactions, market shops/expos, and judicial trails could be held. There are two main basilicas in the forum: the basilica Amelia and the basilica Iulia. They differ in that the the Basilica Julia is much larger, with a central nave and two side isles on each side. You can see the scale difference in the plans:

The larger Basilica Iulia on the bottom, with a center nave area and two side aisles. A nice place to hang out.

The Forum was also populated with a number of temples and honorary columns. The honorary column was kind of a funny thing. It was basically a pedestal that held a singular column on top of which you would find a statue of the man being honored. More often than not these fellows were the ones rich enough to commission sculptors to make the honorary columns, not necessarily ones deserving honor.

Ruins from the Temple of Saturn. Nice.

Tabularium, the judicial building that set the architectural precedent for the Colosseum and many of the theatres of ancient Rome.

Arch of Constantine

That's all for now. I hope you enjoyed the Roman Forum. Go to Rome!

On a lighter note

2009-04-29T16:01:00.003-04:00

We here at the Mansuite love presents, which is why we're so excited about blog reader Cody Widdes' fantastic tribute to the Mansuite. Though we'd consider ourselves all pretty attractive here, it appears that J-do's body just couldn't quite make the Chippendales cut.

Measures of Desperation

2009-04-28T19:54:00.010-04:00

Low and behold, my inbox today was flooded with requests to donate to the senior fund. Most of them polite, one of them stood out from among the rest:

"hey guys,

So just in case you don't know, I am on the senior fund committee and we are on our last stretch to reach our goal of participation. Time is running short and for the sake of convenience and timing, I would like to give on behalf of you for now if you don't mind - I am doing this because I know some of you are off campus or maybe never got reached by our team. I know you all pretty well so I don't foresee this as a problem. However, if you do not want me to do this please email me and I will obviously refrain from doing that."

This act of usurping my agency crosses a line for me. There's a reason why these people are so adamant when they incredulously exclaim "It's just a dollar!" at your frugality. It's because it's not just a dollar, it's a tacit representation of your connection to the university and a symbolic acknowledgment of your agreement and satisfaction with your overall college experience.

Sure, I've had a great time here at Columbia and will in almost all certainty be donating to the university in the future (after I can afford the boat, and the helicopter, and the helicopter on the boat) but this sort of almost-underhanded opt-out scheme disappoints me. The goal is not to give because you feel obligated, but to give because you want to. If there's one thing that Columbia unambiguously and unequivocally cares about, it's money. It's a business that--unlike most other universities--doesn't try to hide that fact; as students you are its customers. In the market customers vote with their wallets, not through their student council or other marginally-empowered elected representatives.

There might be a reason why it's hard to reach the donation goal this year. Some students have realized that the best way to voice their dissatisfaction is to speak the only language Columbia truly understands.

This is the most influence I'll probably ever wield with a single dollar, and I intend to use it wisely.

Edit: Because sane arguments also have supporting evidence, find a page taken out of the 2008 Columbia Annual Security report below:

Campus Crusaders for Polyps

2009-04-27T14:06:00.013-04:00

Exasperated by her unyielding case of laryngitis, mansuite local Sophie agrees to an exorcism of the Pink Polyp cult headed by non other than Shaman Keenan with further help and intervention by Kahuna Reich.

Given how much we've come to love that sultry, raspy whisper over the past several weeks it's a wonder why Sophie doesn't stop struggling to regain her prior vocal panache.

Trapped in time. Surrounded by evil. Low on gas.

2009-04-26T12:27:00.007-04:00

MOVIE NIGHT: APRIL 26th

Tonight we'll be screening the theatrical masterpiece Army of Darkness (1992), starring Bruce Campbell as Ash--a man accidentally transported to 1300 A.D. where he must battle an army of the dead and retrieve the Necronomicon so he can return home. Complications arise.

If you still aren't sure, check out these catchy taglines, most likely written by a pre-teen IMDb surfer:

-1 Man, 1 Million dead, The odds are just about even.

-They move. They breathe. They suck.

-Sound the trumpets, Raise the drawbridge, and drop the Oldsmobile.

-How can you destroy an army that's already dead?

-In an age of darkness. At a time of evil. When the world needed a hero. What it got was him.

In all seriousness though, this movie is amazing. See you at 10:00... and bring your 'boom stick'

In a row over robes

2009-04-23T15:10:00.008-04:00

I'd like to take a moment to write about a serious problem which goes largely unnoticed outside of the robe-wearing community. It's not through any conscious apathy or uncaring on behalf of the larger disrobed majority, yet in some instances grievous issues concerning a small group should concern us all.

No one individual is responsible for the issue as it is a product of a myriad of factors. Robes are manufactured to extend below the knees to keep vulnerable areas warm. Toilets are constructed and raised off the ground¹ in order to decrease the distance between an individual and his or her business. Good intentions mark the presence of both facets, yet as they say, the road to hell is paved in good intentions.

Taken together, these features do not cooperate well with each other. The half-inch overlap almost always guarantees there will be some drag and your robe will leave the bathroom with a little more than what it entered with.

Currently, the only haphazard solution that exists is to hold the article wide open, yet such a task requires the faculty of both hands--leaving the most critical aspect of aiming up to chance and the forces of nature.

The only solutions I've considered as of yet have been supply side. The labor shortage in the bathroom can easily be met by the labor surplus in the suite, yet this will require some negative externalities such as undesirable migration.

There is an ideal outcome, but it requires a capital-intensive demand-side alternative utilizing a sledgehammer and a soldering iron. As of yet I have been unable to raise the necessary funds to procure these items. This is why community involvement is so important.

Open your hearts and your wallets. Please give generously.

¹ At least in our freedom-loving America. This isn't the norm for Charlie.

A Guitar and a Cello

2009-04-23T12:42:00.012-04:00

Mansuite Lounge hosted its first gig last night, featuring a touring duo hailing from soCal! Auditions for next Wednesday's slot will be held tomorrow at 7am in MC's room.

A Guitar and a Cello Album

Groovin

2009-04-22T12:58:00.000-04:00

Un bon weekend

2009-04-21T13:13:00.001-04:00

Hola, brethren and brethrenitas of the PartyDuck! We sincerely hope you had as much fun as we did over the past few days. It was a wild marathon of good this weekend, beginning with the Bacchanal concert on Saturday.

After a long morning of drinking, a call was made for all units to report to the Steps for an afternoon of some serious fun in the sun. First up was Vampire Weekend, Columbia alums and Taqueria-y-fonda devotees, who put our backs out, they were so hip.

FUN! (where's waldo/tom with his sleeves cut off?)

Next up, after landing in NYC from LA at 2:45 and getting to campus 20 minutes before his set, Talib Kweli came out to get us jumpin and deliver some lyrical delights.

Always a fan of audience participation, PartyDuck was elated when he was invited to come dance on stage with Talib! Check out his fowl moves!

Featuring: The Apple Bottom

2009-04-21T13:08:00.002-04:00

"apple bottom"

A Mansuite Case study:

CABO SPRING BREAK RAGER

2009-04-20T16:48:00.000-04:00

Furniture displaced, dishes done, tequila chilled, solo cups purchased, limes in process of being sliced: 64 degrees F, brisk air, neutral scent.

Some besties arrive, chill latin grooves resonate about the common area, visualizer blasts psychadelic vortexing constellations on the back wall: 74 degrees F, air moisture rising.

Lights go out, blacklights on: 79 degrees F, noticeable humidity.

DJ Willie arrives, latin house music blaring, raging commences, HAPPY BIRTHDAY AVA FERENCI: 86 degrees F, sweat lingers--refusing to evaporate into the water-saturated air.

Music breaks loose into controlled insanity and the dancing follows suit: 97 degrees F, unbearably humid.

End result: raging uninterrupted until 1:52, a new suite record. CONGRATS AND THANK YOU TO ALL!

We're lacking in close-up photos! Send your shots from Cabo to thepartyduck@gmail.com!

Fried Egg Breakfast Burger on a Cornbread Bun

2009-04-19T15:56:00.003-04:00

I don't know who got the cornbread that's in our kitchen, but I'm making the most of it!

JAZZ

2009-04-19T13:12:00.002-04:00

Hello all. How was your weekend? Ours was GREAT. It still IS great. Hopefully you guys came to Cabo and enjoyed the beach with us.

I would like to invite you to please come to see my final Columbia Jazz performance of my entire LIFE. The Big Band is playing tonight at Miller Theatre. The Concert begins at 8 pm, and the Big Band will probably go on around 8:45/9. It would mean a lot if you guys dropped by. It will be about 45 minutes of music, and its great stuff. Lots of energy! It's a BIG BAND people.

And afterwards, Mansuite invites you all to our weekly movie night! With our Mansuite chocolate chip cookies to be served, of course.

Please join the fun tonight. Do work now so you can play later.

Graphical Evocations: Today

2009-04-18T21:17:00.019-04:00

(notice the Jezzalian grin beneath Kweli's right arm pit)

If you're not outside right now

2009-04-18T15:23:00.000-04:00

You should be!

Man, I Love College

2009-04-17T18:41:00.012-04:00

Tonight, aspiring to the non-scholastic achievements of our state-school brethren, we're chasing the ideal of carefree college raging with a dance party tequila fest that may prove to be the sweatiest, steamiest gathering thus far at mansuite. Plus, we're actually planning on trapping all the body heat rising from your rhythmic pulsations on the dance floor in order to recreate the humid tropical climate of CABO MEXICO (see sample photos below), our intended but unactualized spring break '09 destination. Bring your bikinis, boardshorts, sunglasses, beach balls, MIXERS and an overflowing supply of post-adolescent-collegiate-spring-break hormones because what happens in Cabo stays in Cabo.

The common room.

From left to right: Jordo, Tom, Colin, Jon.

The babes: Michael is #8.

Below, some materials included in the mansuite Cabo rager training packet, reviewed by all suitemates over the past week in order to perfect party execution. (Special thanks to CF for the vid.)

The following lyrics have also been memorized, internalized and performed privately:

"Man, I love college, ay!
I love drinking, ay!
I love women, ay!
I love college

Now if everybody would please
Put their drink as high as they can
As high as they can
(As high as they can)
And repeat after me

Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!
Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!
Freshmen! Freshmen!
Freshmen! Freshmen!

Do something' crazy! Do somethin' crazy!
Do something' crazy! Do somethin' crazy!
Keg stand! Keg stand!
Keg stand! Keg stand!

(That party last night)
Man, I love college
I love it!
....
Do I really have to graduate?
Or can I just stay here for the rest of my life?"

Dogs CAN Have Chocolate?

2009-04-16T14:11:00.004-04:00

I got real excited about the holiday treats Dad sent the suite—chocolate eggs, chocolate rabbits, nerf football.

Until I realized: nerf football? Nerf isn't chocolate. As far as I know, nerf isn't edible at all, unless you're a dog or a baby (or a baby dog) and you eat everything. Then I checked the return address on the package:

Yep. Corcoran Pet Care Center. My dad sent us dog treats; it was nothing more than a mid-April Fool's joke. Well, nice try, Pops, but you can't fool this Columbian. I immediately went downstairs to throw the whole assortment away. Alas! Michael had already downed the chocolate and was well on his way toward finishing the nerf football.

I wanted to tell him off, but he didn't know any better! So I gave him a tummy rub and called it a day.

One Ninth Barnard

2009-04-15T17:37:00.003-04:00

Graduation is just around the bend, and Barnard is just across the road, so I may as well apply for a Barnard degree while I'm here. Brushing up on my Nine Ways of Knowing, today I worked on "Cooking and Baking":

Back to Basics

2009-04-15T14:54:00.007-04:00

Blog content has been strange in the past days; the staples of our existence have been thrown carelessly to the wayside. I intend to change that. With this beautiful cut of meat:

mmmmh.

A Mansuite Meal

There are many positive externalities of cooking a beautiful dinner such as this fine specimen. They, of course, would be protein, carbs, fiber, immediate gratification, family time, etc. Here's another one:

Leftovers! Exemplified here in the form of the Irish breakfast. I just ate that 20 minutes ago. *Not pictured: smoothie.

Hungry? Why wait?

Mustard Envy?

2009-04-15T13:07:00.003-04:00

All I know if that if you guys try to buy all of those flavors on our next Fairway run, I'm not paying.

And "He" ketchup? I'd much rather have whatever this guy is having:

"He" Suite

2009-04-15T00:51:00.003-04:00

Not long ago, Mansuite encountered the most delightful Honey Mustard in the world: Inglehoffer. And at Fairway we discovered they have a whole range of condiments:

Cocktail Sauce, Tartar Sauce, Horseradish (Cream Style, Extra Hot, and Wasabi), and of course Mustards. Oh, the Mustards! They have 16 styles of Mustard!!!

Don't believe me? I'll name 'em!

Traditional Dijon
Hot Dijon
Sweet Hot
Stone Ground
Dijon Stone Ground
Honey
Honey Maple
Orange 'N Honey
Whole Seed Honey
Cranberry
Creamy Dill
Deli
Original Horseradish
Stone Ground
Creamy Dill
Sweet Hot (with Honey)

But what about the ketchup? Inglehoffer doesn't make it, but I think I know what we need. Anybody know where we can get "He" Ketchup?

How SIPA students become so worldly

2009-04-14T23:40:00.008-04:00

Walking out of Lehman library, I noticed an informative MSNBC report about a topic that probably deserves more air-time on our leftist liberal news networks:

Teabagging Obama and his wife.

The television was on mute, unfortunately, so I have no context and no idea what kind of entendre they were giving the term, but I'd like to imagine the reporter professionally announcing a group's intentions to carry out lewd acts against the president.

There was literally an illustrated comic with the title "Teabagging Michelle" which they had so handily superimposed on the screen.

If only could have been fast enough with my camera.

Mansuite Trial Update

2009-04-14T21:44:00.003-04:00

Well we don't have much news except intelligence has uncovered who is really behind the War on Fun. (watching to the end will explain)

Your Weekly Reminder

2009-04-14T21:16:00.004-04:00

TO NEVER GO TO CAMPO AGAIN.

[Ed.-- I hope this doesn't appear every week. We don't pay you by the post you know.]

The Roman Forum! A Chance to Learn

2009-04-14T01:15:00.010-04:00

Plan of the Forum. The Black dots represent columns.

This cornice once stood 75 feet in the air--maybe even higher, but it still had to be perfect.

The larger Basilica Iulia on the bottom, with a center nave area and two side aisles. A nice place to hang out.

Ruins from the Temple of Saturn. Nice.

Tabularium, the judicial building that set the architectural precedent for the Colosseum and many of the theatres of ancient Rome.

Arch of Constantine

Beating out Bwog to Expose the Newsiest News

2009-04-14T01:04:00.014-04:00

is fun.

Presenting: the inaugural 'Moustache Monday'

Momentous occasion in my life:

But there is more:

All photos courtesy of Jordo O'Mansuite © 2009 ® 2009 as well as J-Slice^TM and J-miss-new-booty^TM

A GOREY CATASTROPHE

2009-04-14T00:25:00.009-04:00

The Management would like to reneg another endorsement: Buxfer.

And for that matter, all locations on the Interweb where we store important information are no longer getting shout-outs on our Twitters or drunk-dials on the weekends.

Why?

BECAUSE WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF THEY ALL DISAPPEARED?

LIKE BUXFER JUST DID!?

Exhibit A: An error message while I was doing a late-night premise walk around my important Interweb Locations

Failed to Connect
Firefox can't establish a connection to the server at www.buxfer.com.

WHAT?

Though the site seems valid, the browser was unable to establish a connection.

WHY THE F NOT?!

* Could the site be temporarily unavailable? Try again later.
* Are you unable to browse other sites? Check the computer's network connection.
* Is your computer or network protected by a firewall or proxy? Incorrect settings can interfere with Web browsing.

THOSE ARE ALL TERRIBLE SUGGESTIONS THAT DO NOT HELP ME!

(I have screen-shot evidence of this, but the Interweb doesn't want me to expose it and thus won't let me post it.)

Upon realizing that this could indeed happen, I went straight to the computer lab and printed out all my Facebook wall posts and messages I have Starred on gmail. I used up all of my print quota and had to put another $20 on, but at least now I am safe.

Who is responsible for this savage scheme to leave us information-less?

ALBERT GORE.

"Now look here, I am a skeezy mo'fugger and I am out to get you."

Yes, the former vice-president and failed presidential candidate, but more importantly, THE FATHER OF THE INTERNET. He gave the world the Interweb sometime in the interwar years, and ever since then, we have only used it to develop greater and greater things. Combined with amazing advances in technology, we can now store infinite amounts of information, indefinitely.

Certain "websites" seduced us with this combination. I don't know about you, but we all keep important information on the Interweb, such as the posts on this blog, and our expenses on Buxfer.com. Without Buxfer, we would have no idea how much we owe each other!!

I now direct you to 2000, when Alan Gore lost the presidential race.

Tracy Jordan, catching Mr. Gore as he learns the news. Dr. Chris Kattan prepares to resuscitate.

Now let's look at 2006, when Alfred Gore scared the bejeezus out of us with his propaganda movie, The Inconvenient Truth. Until then, people acted rationally and kept hard copies of their information. With the new "green" movement that he started, we thought it would be a good idea to reduce our consumption of worldly delights such as paper by getting a Second Life and donating all of our hard-earned information to Google.

Now you're all caught up to speed.

Now, imagine if ALABAMA GORE TAKETH THAT WHICH HE HATH GIVETH, AND STOLE ALL OF OUR INFORMATION? The world would clearly fall apart. I do not think I need to say any more on this point.

"I can already taste my global domination."

Silly Americans, looks like you should have elected him in 2000, his plots are much smarter and more devious than that chump Bush.

(I would also like to point out that right as I finished this post, this message appeared:

Could not contact Blogger.com. Saving and publishing may fail. Retrying...

SEE WHAT I MEAN? THE HIVE IS SMARTER THAN US!)

(On a mildly related note, there may be some comfort, or perhaps greater discomfort - to be found in playing with the Wayback Machine.)

With Love,

- The Management

UPDATE: 0200 hrs - it looks like Buxfer.com has been returned to us. You say it was a temporary problem with the connection, I say that there is no science of any kind that can explain this interruption of service away so easily. As an Anthropologist, I know well the signs of a hive mind when I see one, and this is an obvious example. HEY ALOUETTE GORE AND YOUR HIVE MIND: Thanks for bringing back Buxfer, but don't think you can appease me so easily. YOUR DAYS ARE NUMBERED!

Oh yeah?

2009-04-13T19:02:00.005-04:00

Maybe I just need to try harder...

Okay, fine! I don't know what banana bread is.* I thought the label might suffice. Luckily, my bread can wait, as our suite has been graced by a visiting bakeress, who has provided us with a cake a day for the past two days!

The (2/3) Finished Product

*I actually do know what banana bread is, so there!

Can't fool me

2009-04-13T12:53:00.002-04:00

Post Graduation

2009-04-12T21:12:00.003-04:00

The above words bring a bad taste to most people's mouths. I am fortunate that I have about 10 months covered before I need to freak out with everyone else. My friend Ryan has some sweet plans. This isn't directly Mansuite related but it's pretty awesome nonetheless. Ryan is going to run across Europe. Literally. He will not be checking any luggage. He will fly to Amsterdam and run to Greece (with 1 ferry ride towards the end). So if other plans have fallen through think about running somewhere. Or going and renting an apartment in Europe and letting Ryan sleep there some night between now and October.

www.ryanlukejohns.com/runseurope

Cake Heals All Wounds

2009-04-12T16:48:00.006-04:00

When I came to the big city four years ago, I really didn't have much of a plan. One thing I knew I wanted to do was join Fruit Paunch, the legendary improv group I had heard so much about from my older sister. So I did, and that move has defined my time here. My closest friends, mentors, and Mike Molina have all been Paunchies. I'll try not to get too emotional here, but last night was my last Furnald lounge show at Columbia and, well...

Shit's getting real.

And it's only going to get realer as graduation approaches (and as we add flax seed to our smoothies! ;-). Luckily, Mansuite always pulls through to ease the transition process. Like last night, the suite came together to make a delicious dinner for Paunch & Co.

Tom, of course, led the cooking, and Rachel, of course, led the eating.

The culmination, however, came with the presentation of a cake specially made to honor Paunch (aren't they all) and the singing of "Happy Fruit Paunch to You." Thanks guys, you made my night.

Dear suitemates

2009-04-11T20:48:00.000-04:00

Please post on the blog. It's getting really lonely out here.

Campo Reneg

2009-04-06T21:50:00.008-04:00

Hello everyone. I will now take a moment to broadcast a complaint about the lame events of this afternoon, when the owner of Campo told me that they have lost interest in hosting the Jazz Nights that many of you have enjoyed over the past couple of Tuesday nights. We had a great time! Bummer! Thanks for your support guys.

This unfortunate occurrence has confirmed a growing suspicion of mine that in fact the owner of Campo is a massive booger. Literally, a huge booger. The dude played me for a foo, constantly postponing meetings, canceling multiple times on late notice, and now, saying that his "business partner" thinks they have to "re-evaluate" before we "nail anything down". In other words, this booger didn't even have the courage to just tell it me straight.

Here's the bottom line comrades. Campo blows. Its weird. Strange. Sketchy. I knew this already, and I was the annoying guy telling you to go there all of the time because blah blah blah I was playing drums. Sorry for that. Luckily, now that I am not playing anymore, you can all return to your normal "Heck no, I'm not going to Campo! GROSS!" ways.

Right?

Don't give the booger your money. BOO THAT MAN.

And then come to Mansuite instead and drink for free!

Colin and the Doolettes

2009-04-06T12:25:00.004-04:00

In case you missed it last weekend, Colin and his band gave a rousing 14-hour performance on Saturday.

The concert song list is below:

If you're feeling a bit peckish... (1:15)
...Hot dogs are a dollar (0:47)
Spin me right round (college walk) (5:27)
Allegro molto in G minor (14:11)
Job (3:14)
Awkward silence with ambient commentary [J. Cage cover] (13:21:07)

Encore: ...Hot dogs are a dollar [reprise] (0:57)

Colin on vocals and Dooley on the script

Crisis Averted

2009-04-05T21:01:00.002-04:00

Tom was wrong. Someone did take a picture of us rafting. Luckily they caught the very moment Winston fell out of the raft.

Costa Rica Days: Part Un

2009-04-05T19:32:00.009-04:00

Recent events at Mansuite have paralyzed business as usual. Unjust disciplinary action, strong unfriendly winds from the east and a dwindling supply of toothpaste have defined post-spring break life. The weight of these realities has unfortunately halted efforts to provide due posts about our glorious trip to Costa Rica, which happened of course in lieu of our planned trip to Cabo as a result of a problem with the flights and a rerouting from Mexico to San Jose.

We enjoyed an impressively long trip, so posting about the entirety would take way too long and would prevent all of our voices being heard. So I’ll choose to talk about the first couple of days, and I will hope that my comrades will fill in the rest.

Hearts

It all began with a frantic departure from EC, with the team divided up into two cabs headed to JFK. The next thing we knew, Winston was asleep on the floor of the airport in Panama City, and THEN the next thing we knew, our connecting flight had landed in San Jose. It was there that we ran into this:

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

With Mansuite + Dink somehow alive and in one piece, we got the rental car and managed to get out of San Jose alive. Windy roads and Jordan’s bad driving made Colin vom:

Luckily, Colin found this hilarious:

The rest of us also found this hilarious. Our first destination on the Costa Rican tour was the Arenal volcano, the big scary active volcano in the central highlands. Seeing as it was our goal to conquer this active volcano, we all shared a nice dinner at the hostel paired with a round of Imperials and proceeded to pass out.

We woke up the following morning to:

And this:

Scandal.

The hike up Arenal was stellar. Past the trailhead we forded a river and began the steady climb. After reaching the ‘don’t enter’ sign, we entered, and discovered a path down to a dried up lava flow path. AWESOME. We obviously elected to follow this path, and found a great opening in the dense coverage that offered a fantastic view up the volcano.

Epic. Incidentally, also our last moment on earth.

Then something strange happened. We started to notice the booming sounds coming from the massive beast, and we wondered what they could be. Then all of the sudden, LAVA! A tidal wave of molten red death appeared on the horizon, cascading down the relentlessly steep façade. We knew we were goners. “Winnsstoonn, we never should have gone off trail!” said Colin. Those were his final words.

Unclear how this fits into the story.

Actually, those booming sounds turned out to be massive rocks that were tumbling down the other side of the volcano a half mile away. In the bright midday sunlight, to us they only looked like regular boulders, but later that evening when we had finished all of our hiking around the volcano, we got a look at Arenal at night and we saw that those “boulders” were in fact glowing red chunks of volcanic material that constantly broke off from the peak and tumbled down the mountain.

...

After surviving a live volcanic eruption due to impressive physical strength and Michael’s recently downloaded “momentarily stop volcanic eruption” app on his iPhone, we made our way to a nearby trailhead leading to the waterfall. What had been up to that point a day of sweaty, manly, volcano hiking quickly turned into this:

Raging homo-eroticism Part 1 of 24,530.

After a long morning out in the boiling Costa Rica sun, the chilly waterfall provided a much needed respite from the day’s intensity. Fully refreshed from the cool icy Costa Rican water, we headed for a final hike of the day to Cerro Chatto, a nearby dormant volcano beside Arenal. What was meant to be a 2-3 hour hike we did in about 45 minutes by running up the impressively steep terrain. It was an obstacle course of vines, rocks, and mud. The sky turned grey, the dense inland forest cold and unwelcoming. We moved on, following Winston’s green headband up and up, until we reached the peak of the monster. The prize for our efforts lay within the volcano’s dormant core, down a steep 150m cavernous drop into the basin that had formed inside the volcano’s peak. There was a lake there now; Michael, Winston, and Jon waded out for a brief and terrifying swim before scuttling out of the oozing sediment declaring, as a result of the massive prehistoric sea monster that undoubtedly lay waiting in the unknown depths of the volcanic lake, that this had been the most horrifying experience of their lives.

Tired, wet, and covered in weird volcanic lake water, we found ourselves deep inside the crater of a dormant volcano in Costa Rica at 5 pm. The dense clouds were rolling in and the warm guidance from the sun was rolling out. Despair! We hurried our way up the crater, back to the peak, and worked our way down the technical terrain back to the base of the trail. A light drizzle punctuated the dark grey skies. Exhausted, malnourished, and dehydrated, we stumbled back to the car in search of food and water.

Day One was truly ridiculous. Here are some of the remaining pics:

Sexual?

Sexual.

New friends.

ANTS

Our ride.

Sunday morning met us with glorious sunlight. We were headed off to La Fortuna, a nearby town, where we would meet up with our white water rafting unit taking us through the countryside to a morning of Class 3-4 rapids. The river wasn’t too high, so the rapids were unfortunately a bit gentler than we had expected. No one was seriously injured, which was a huge bummer. Colin will point out, however, that Winston did in fact bail out, only to be saved by Jon in a dramatic feat of strength. Unfortunately we don’t have any pictures from the rafting, so you’ll have to use your imagination.

After rafting, it was our goal to make it all of the way to Monteverde by nightfall. We had to get all of the way around the large inland Lake Arenal and then through the windy dirt roads in a matter of hours. The drive around the lake was fantastic and provided stellar vistas of the dramatic inland mountains meeting the expansive water. After a couple of wrong turns, we successfully made it past the lake to the windy roads leading to Monteverde—Costa Rica’s cloud forest region. Adventures surely awaited us there on Monday, but a curious detour would mark an unexpected stop that proved to be one of the most ridiculous nights of the trip.

i.e. .CLIFFHANGER. Stay tuned

MVI Night

2009-04-05T13:46:00.004-04:00

Party Duck's April Fools joke is growing wearisome. We all know it's you, PD! Nevertheless, he continues to speak in a British accent, and insists we call him T. Party Duck. He also refuses to call the place "Mansuite," and keeps coming up with new names for it. Some of our favorites:

The Orange Abode
House of the Crimson Robes
The Rage Cage (we're not sure if this refers to the entire suite, or just the den upstairs)
The Family Circus
The Quack House (clever, Mr. Duck)
Chateau Garçon -or- Chalet Poupée (these are used when PD assumes his French alter ego, Fête Duck)
MVI

If you're astute you'll have realized that the final name is 1006, the number of our suite, in Roman numerals. It's also three of the six letters in movie, so, with that segue I announce, for MoVIe night tonight we will be screening The Bourne Ultimatum. Be here at 9 if you don't want to miss the beginning.

This is madness!

2009-04-04T16:30:00.000-04:00

The Suite Isn't Perfect

2009-04-03T12:47:00.003-04:00

For one thing, we have too many green toothbrushes. Which one is mine? (hint: it's in the mirror)

And too many empty toothpaste tubes!

Too Late

2009-04-03T01:47:00.008-04:00

A poem on transience, paraphrased by one member of Mansuite.

Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower,
but only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
In autumn she achieves,
A still for golden blaze.
But nothing golden-brown, griddled, with bacon and eggs in the middle stays.

You Got Me!

2009-04-02T13:13:00.002-04:00

All yesterday there was this dapper looking gentleman in our common room. I just couldn't figure out who it was. You got me again party duck!

Happy (belated) April Fool's and happy Birthday Dink!

Columbia alcohol policy protects University at expense of student health and safety

2009-03-31T19:46:00.020-04:00

The Columbia University undergraduate alcohol policy directly and negatively impacts the health and safety of the student body. It gives students incentives to act in an unsafe and unhealthy manner.

But maybe I'm getting ahead of myself.

If you are close to any one of us, you would know by now that we are involved in a disciplinary process with Columbia over an incident that occurred in early March. Now that the bulk of the trial hearings are over, I feel confidant that I can publish the details without consequence. The short of the matter is that a freshman drank before coming to our suite--where we provided her no alcohol--and became sick. A second freshman, still naive and believing Columbia to be a benign institution that actually cares about the welfare of its students, called CAVA and instructed them to come to our suite. CAVA met the intoxicated individual as she was on her way home in the courtyard, deemed the call to be unnecessary and permitted the student to return home to sleep off the alcohol.

Where do we come in?

Blissfully unaware of the forces building up against us, like a tsunami out at sea, the Monday after spring break Columbia welcomed us back with open arms and an allegation for "Reckless endangerment of student health."

We just had our hearings today, which made us aware of some troubling developments: the concept of a "fair hearing" at the judicial process is a farce, the policies the University maintains are contradictory and any notion that the University actually prioritizes the well-being of its students over itself is blatantly untrue.

The fact of the matter is that somebody at our party called CAVA for somebody they thought was in trouble, and now everybody involved is facing disciplinary action. If students perceive that calling CAVA gets you in trouble, it completely undermines the purpose of a critical service. For this very reason, sane universities have instituted Good Samaritan policies to protect anybody involved in the incident. For example, an excerpt of Dartmouth's alcohol policy:

"When a student or organization assists an intoxicated individual in procuring Safety and Security, local or state police, and/or professional medical assistance, neither the intoxicated individual, if a Dartmouth student, nor the individual or group who assists will be subject to formal College disciplinary action for (1) being intoxicated, or (2) having provided that person alcohol."

An editorial on the subject presents the argument for the Good Samaritan laws in that "they provide students with the clarity they need in order to make responsible, life saving decisions during confusing and stressful party situations. Every minute spent worrying about judicial consequences is another minute it will take for help to arrive. That minute can very literally be the difference between life and death."¹

When I raised this issue with the Judiciary Affairs office, it was blown off with a confusing statement that since I am 21, if somebody were to call CAVA on me, I "would not be sitting where I am right now." Should students then be checking ID on unconscious or injured people before calling for help? This is exactly the weighing of "judicial consequences" the editorial calls to abolish. Columbia bureaucracy either cannot or refuses to even consider the negative ramifications of linking CAVA and disciplinary action. In the future, If I were to come across an individual in need within my suite I would either 1) not call for help or 2) move the injured individual and dump them outside the boundary of the suite before seeking assistance.

This is a problem.

Columbia maintains that the "common room" is a public space and therefore nobody (not even people of age) can possess or consume alcohol in it--despite the fact that the residents of the common room are responsible for all actions that occur within it. According to the judiciary committee, the only place a legal student can drink is within their own room, the occupancy of which cannot ever exceed only a few people. Though one would like to give the university the benefit of the doubt, it makes it much easier to pin infractions on individuals should there be a problem when they are drinking in their own room as opposed to the slight chance the university might assume liability for a problem which occurs in a common space.

Columbia's policies encourage individuals to a) drink alone and away from peer supervision inside their own rooms and b) not seek assistance for anybody who could be in a potentially dangerous situation.

Are these the policies of a university who cares about its students? It's clear that Columbia places minimizing its own liability higher than the health and safety of its undergraduate population.

¹http://media.www.diamondbackonline.com

Story of our lives

2009-03-30T15:02:00.029-04:00

A little known fact is that the 1980's ski movie thriller Hot Dog is actually based on Columbia's very own ski and ride alpine racing team. Today we'll go behind the scenes to uncover the true story which inspired the film.

From the outset, it is clear that the cover art lifted directly from our ski team "New Year's at the Beach" party:

The choice of cover art is peculiar in that bathing suits feature in exactly zero scenes within the film. Following this rationale, they might as well have included a couple more chicks and a Yeti.

The seductive cover character, Tweed, is in fact based off of our very own Cody Widdes. The director makes a subtle homage in once scene by presenting her in a transparent party dress similar to Cody's race uniform:

It was unfortunate that the film, to meet MPAA rating standards, had to cut some of the juicier parts of our apreé ski activities:

[img: scr = "/cu_sauna_sugarloaf.jpg" has been removed (ToS violation)]

Ski Ballet, originally invented by the CU Ski and Ride team, became popularized through Top Dog. In the season following the film's release it was almost impossible to make your way down green runs without encountering hoards of individuals practicing this new technique.

When we discovered that prick Lafayette kids had rigged the competition and won the Hunter Mountain Downhill Regional Cup we launched a full-scale ambush. The film captures the drama of war stunningly.

We decided that the only fair way to resolve our differences would be through a Chinese Downhill. The only rules: There are no rules. Every effort was made to replicate the detail of the actual uniforms used.

Rare actual race footage was made available to the stunt actors in the film. The scene itself required three months to shoot; given the danger to both film crew and stuntmen, the utmost level of precaution had to be taken, including the use of special harnesses and multiple 24 hour emergency crews.

No amendments had to be made to the conclusion; the real life event ended happily.

Of course, some things never change:

Testosterone Overload (Right into the Banana Bread) Edition

2009-03-28T19:55:00.007-04:00

When astute, repeat manblog reader Stacey B detected a lull in blog posts over the past week, following spring break's momentous Central American seven man road trip, she couldn't help but inquire, "so has mansuite OBed?" The moment of awkward silence that ensued was due only to the shame I felt for having immediately (and correctly) identified the acronym in question as "over-brosed."

From wikipedia:
"The term "bro-verload" (or "overbrose" or simply OB) describes the ingestion, internalization or general over-exposure to bro substance in quantities greater than are recommended or generally practiced. An overbrose is widely considered harmful and dangerous, and it can result in death."
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/man_overbrose)

In actuality, we've been lying low this week, doing a number of drills in prep for trial (read: core and a bit of biceps). Come see the progress firsthand at movie night this Sunday where 80s ski movie classic "Hot Dog" will be screened at 9:30 or so. And that's not all! We're willing to throw in a ONE TIME OFFER for THIS MOVIE NIGHT ONLY: get your biceps, chest and neck measured for FREE with our tape measure. Winner in each category gets the biggest pieces of Auntie "Colin" Drummond's freshly baked banana bread!

A Few Good Mansuite Men Part II

2009-03-25T12:55:00.006-04:00

The good ship HMS Mansuite with destination Mexico has run upon a rocky shoal this week. Details are still under wraps but we've gotten into a bit of a tussle with the University administration. How much weight they think they can throw around against six very-jaded and very-cynical seniors remains to be seen. Nevertheless, closed circuit cameras within the suite have been recording our activity leading up to the hearing next week:

Cleanup in Aisle 6

2009-03-23T20:29:00.005-04:00

We've innovated a new method for getting to Fairway, utilizing the potential energy of Columbia's elevated position in the ivory tower in order to get to Fairway without expending so much energy during the journey that we shop hungry and end up buying $350 worth of Mallomars and Pop Tarts. Some people were probably wondering which aisle had the scooters.

Armed with our fearsome arsenal of ingredients, Jon produced something that I have no idea what it was: hopefully he does; though it was delicious.

Bam-Bam, Ba-nam-Bam! Ba-na-nam, ba-nam-bam-bam!

2009-03-23T10:13:00.003-04:00

Foreword
I considered writing this movie night post on some of my favorite visual jokes in movies, since Jurassic Park has one of them:

But the only other one I could think of off the top of my head is from the Big Lebowski, when the dude tries to prop his door closed with a chair, but the door opens out, so the plan is ineffective. If I think of any more, maybe I'll submit a list to PaRMLoT. In the meantime, I'll use this post to rehash an old conviction, and make a different list while I'm at it.

Word
If you know how to read music, you'll likely recognize that the title of this post is the main theme from Jurassic Park, which we watched last night. This makes it the second movie night movie we've watched with a John Williams score. I therefore insist the next movie we watch be scored by Hans, because I like him better. Here are some options:

Movies Scored by Hans Zimmer That We Should Watch for Next Movie Night
1. True Romance
2. Backdraft
3. Twister

Those are some of my favorites. Other options include Cool Runnings, Thelma and Louise, The Dark Night, The Lion King, Gladiator, Rain Man, The Rock, Crimson Tide, Black Hawk Down, or Frost/Nixon.

Backword
Or Muppet Treasure Island.

Party Duck Returns From "Spring Migration"

2009-03-22T13:15:00.003-04:00

Since Party Duck lives in our suite, he doesn't really need to migrate, but he took this past week's time off to sojourn south to his family's wintering home in Mexico.

While there, he spent a few days pursuing one of his great passions: paleontology. When Party Duck is on his game, he tends to get lucky, and this excursion was no exception. Only a few hours into digging PD unearthed an exceptional specimen, beautifully preserved. His discovery was the party bone of a now extinct species of recreational dinosaur, Dyonychus festivus.* Debate is ongoing within the scientific party-bird community, but some (including PD) believe Dyonychus was an ancient forerunner to modern day party-birds. The phenotypic similarity, in any case, seems promising:

*Dyonychus should not be confused with Deinonychus, a genus of carnivorous dinosaur closely related to the Velociraptor. Dyonychus, rather, was a genus of small, bird-like dinosaur believed to spend most of its time partying. This behavioral speculation is based on paleoecological evidence suggesting the diet of Dyonychus consisted primarily of a mood-altering fern. Inedible to most herbivores, Dyonychus was able to metabolize the fern, but its side-effects are believed to have included impaired psychomotor coordination, muscle relaxation, euphoria, and in some cases shirt removal. Experts refer to the fern colloquially as "giggle weed."

Fooled you!

2009-03-13T02:50:00.001-04:00

So I hate to spring it, but we're not actually going to Cabo. We don't want to die in a Mexican drug cartel kidnapping/ransom operation. But we are going to Costa Rica! Tonight! Until Sunday! (the 21st). Don't expect any posts from us, but that doesn't mean we don't still love you.

COLIN IS A 'CAMPUS CHARACTER'

2009-03-12T01:05:00.013-04:00

"You might not know the following figures--but you should. In Campus Characters, The Blue and White introduces you to a handful of Columbians who are up to interesting and extraordinary things, and whose stories beg to be shared" (Blue and White Feb/March pg 8).

As though my neighbor and troupe-leader Colin wasn't too cool for school before, his illiosity has now been recognized--and concomitantly magnified--by ironically highfalutin, hipster-hating, Spectator-dwarfing preeminent campus publication, The Blue and White. And I intend to harness all the forthcoming benefits of "Bulldog" Drummond's newfound celebrity status by coaxing him to introduce me to his new ~~groupies~~ ~~band-dates~~ troupe dates.

But before I go polish Colin's shoes, pour him a scotch and massage his sinewy shoulder blades, I thought I'd re-cap some of the great times I've shared with Colin in the past several days, intermingled with some quotes from the article which bears his name.

"Current seniors, take heed: Colin Drummond, CC '09, isn't worried about next year, and you shouldn't be either."

(Me 'n Colin at COOP Rowdy Howdy rager held in Mansuite.)

"In another manifestation of his deep but quixotic involvement with theatre, Drummond also held the title of 'Cupcake Czar' during last year's Varsity Show, earning him the alias varsity_cupcake@columbia.edu."

(Me 'n Colin gettin' down by the Canadian border, March 2009)

"Drummond hit the housing jackpot this year: he is a proud member of an East Campus 'Mansuite,' which now has its very own blog. ('A leage of kings, a fellowship of brothers, a suite of men.') He shares the space with five friends he made during his COOP pre-orientation week trip."

(Me 'n Colin enjoying a quiet moment in the kitchen of our mountain chalet. Oddly enough, the quality of this photo is identical to my perception of Colin at the time this photo was taken.)

"Tall and soft-spoken..."

(Me 'n Colin gazing out across the Vermont countryside heading back to the Big Apple by coach for business.)

Eve's Timely Comment:

2009-03-12T00:27:00.004-04:00

me: ooooooh mama (referring to ~~Costa Rica~~ Cabo)

eve: you guys will all come back brown and sexual-looking

YES

Epitomized

2009-03-11T14:18:00.006-04:00

Luigi, Wario, and...Michael. Photo: Winnie

[wcb edit: with two prizes (below) and three stallions in the room, some infighting was inevitable]

Condo 2005

2009-03-10T10:35:00.002-04:00

Cheers to my suite away from suite. Amidst the exuberance documented below, we also found serenity in the north: hiking the mountain for first tracks, late night Planet Earth, chillaxin' at the sauna or just on our couch, and the deep calm of snow dusted glades.

2009-03-10T00:52:00.006-04:00

This past weekend was heavily taxing on all involved. There was much to be done, but luckily, plenty of time to get it done in. We didn't get the 4" we were praying for (that's what she said) on our way up to VT, but we still hit the trail for a few hours, as seen here:

It wasn't all fun and games. Someone had to cook. We let Tom out of the kitchen briefly to get some air. It must have been intense in there, seeing as how he had to wear goggles to make sandwiches.

We couldn't even eat inside, so we ate in the cold snow:

There were no chairs left, so I was forced to go hang out in the hammock that we set up between our condo and the trail:

Somehow, we managed to end the day in high spirits:

Our condo was hard working all weekend. Not only did we hit the slopes, but we also wrote midterms, two at a time! Without even changing out of our ski gear! While drunk!

When that was all said and done, we finally relaxed, figuring we were in the clear. It sure was tiring out there, so we had a little family time by the fire:

You deserve that, Colin.

But wait! What is that sneaking up on Talia?

Surely it's not... it couldn't be... a mustache invasion!

This mustache means business.

It's business time for this mustache.

Aaaaaand there was an alien. He was really tall and lanky. And maybe blond.

Alas, all good things must come to an end. And so we bid you adieu, Jay Peak, avec tes Quebecoises si belles et ton drapeau Canadien si fort et magnifique. A la prochaine, ma cherie.

Sincerement,

le management

L(a)nch Time (2): Reflecting on Saturday's Lunch

2009-03-09T15:33:00.018-04:00

Snowboarding Home to the Slopeside Condo After a Midday Shop in VT
A Series of Haiku by Winston

Slashing slush at Jay
Homeward bound with groceries
Airing jumps with eggs.

Back at the condo
Euro dance party out back
Only four eggs broke.

Used eggs anyway
What they don’t know won’t hurt them
Served with Mac and Cheese.

Clay flies past with cape
Chairs trailside for spectating
Steep-lipped jump is built.

Second course grilled cheese
Fran and Eve woo hot doggers
‘Hey, Come hit our jump!’

Cold ones aplenty
Fourth terrain park, our backyard
Lunch is done, let’s ride.

L(a)unch time

2009-03-07T14:01:00.001-05:00

Mac and cheese with eggs, grilled cheese with bacon, and garrett
throwing backflips off the home made kicker on skis (but not in ski boots)

Canadian invasion

2009-03-06T22:54:00.002-05:00

All's well at the border. We're steadfast in manning our post. Sorry
about leaving you such a mess, Jon. I hope you took pictures of the
damage.

[retrospective photo addition by WCB below: Tom's prettier side]

<3 mansuite

OH BOY

2009-03-06T18:47:00.004-05:00

Saturday 2 AM:

Saturday 6 PM:

Also, by my calculations 5 of the people who left last night may have been a little chilly. At least 3 of them may have been completely naked.

Last night was fun!

(if that clothing is yours, call me to claim it)

Weekend Advert

2009-03-05T14:51:00.005-05:00

Re: Cabo, Attn: Interested parties

2009-03-04T14:32:00.002-05:00

Do not forget about our Cabo planning meeting tonight. Be there or be left out.

Thwarting public safety

2009-03-03T21:09:00.010-05:00

Despite a ridiculous amount of effort in transporting close to 400 pounds of snow to the steps of low (it's still there, if you go look--and probably will be until April), Public Safety saw fit to end our fun on the grounds that we might potentially injure small children. At 11pm at night.

They must have thought a whole gang of six-year-olds were simply hiding in the bushes waiting to sprint out and dive under somebody's skis.

Lucky for us, the NYPD actual has real issues to attend to other than squashing fun and as such we were able to construct a jump out of hay bales in Riverside park. I can't say that we've ever had a better Monday night.

Tuesday Brunch with Tom & Jordo

2009-03-03T13:08:00.003-05:00

Simple really. Banana berry smoothies; scrambled eggs with cream cheese and parsley; breakfast snausages.

Siii.

Michael entered the living room as we sat down to eat. Envious of our meal, he stormed the kitchen with high hopes of creating his own masterpiece, only to be thwarted by the devastating reality that he alone had failed to evolve past the neanderthal stage of human development.

And the Engineer Said He Couldn't Write:

2009-03-02T21:13:00.005-05:00

The following is an excerpt from a Mansuite + Jason email chain meant to organize a team meeting for our trip to Cabo:

WINSTON

Here's a round up of the comments so far, just to keep us all oriented:

Tom, Michael and I will begin out meeting at 7:30 and we will be extremely productive. Shortly after 8, Jason and Jordo will arrive with beers for everyone and we will begin to get wasted, productivity will decline rapidly but we'll still be planning away. Then Tom will leave, trashed, for big band at 9. Jon and Colin might come.

JASON
One more request: we must only drink Imperial, la cerveza de [Cabo, ed.].

COLIN
I get out of class at 8, so like Jordo and Winston, I will join you shortly thereafter.

JON
I will plan on being there at 7 to make some food for all of us beginning to be ready at 7:30. However on my way out of Mudd I will be abducted by aliens. I will wake up in a large tank of liquid somehow still breathing with my lungs. There will be a probe in my [ed]. After seducing the alien empress with my eyes she will let me out of my pickle chamber and make love to me in 1 dimension humans are not able to normally experience (and 2 of the ones we normally are able to experience). She will have 23 snoodiggers and I will enter at least 15 of them. As I go to light up a cigarette afterward she will explode as her blood is made up of volatile hydrocarbons.

Her death will spur an utter hatred for me onboard the ship and immediately the aliens will hyper jump back to earth. Having traveled well past the speed of light for a good minute and a half, when I return the sun will now be a red giant and earth will be orbiting only a few thousand miles from the sun. The oceans will have long ago boiled off and earth is now a crusty dry hot rock. I will look for you guys but I will be approximately 12.3 million years late for our meeting.

So sorry guys, just save me a beer please. I love imperial.

Why don't we...

2009-03-02T18:27:00.005-05:00

...go to Dave and Busters more often?

Spin-N-Win!

Jumpin' Jackpot!!

Prizes!!!

Sunday Morning Delicious

2009-03-01T15:19:00.003-05:00

Banana and maple syrup cream cheese stuffed french toast with rosemary home fries.

News from the (cold) front

2009-03-01T00:05:00.006-05:00

"There have been complaints people running around in togas drinking beer. One more complaint and I'm calling the cops."

Jeesh, real Romans didn't have to put up with pissy Motel 6 managers.

Dear friends:

2009-02-28T00:09:00.000-05:00

Enjoy your bus ride!

It's go time.

2009-02-27T17:18:00.003-05:00

We'll see what the judges think.

Iron chef: It's almost go time.

2009-02-27T17:15:00.000-05:00

Final touches in the kitchen.

Ingredients en route

2009-02-27T14:02:00.000-05:00

Live viewing of the prep process in the suite until 4pm. Also, Tom has
a purse.

Liveblogging IronChef

2009-02-27T13:42:00.000-05:00

We can't find shit.

Google Maps

2009-02-26T15:09:00.006-05:00

As second semester seniors, I'd be lying if I said that we all didn't have a lot of time on our hands. Just yesterday Colin and I were discussing taking a couple of days off of school to do a road trip to Alaska. Tobin happened to walk in right when we were talking about it, so it looks like he's coming too. Anybody else down? I even looked up directions on google for it.

Mansuite Blues leads to Salvation

2009-02-26T00:21:00.008-05:00

Mansuite has seen some of its darkest days yet. Ski team has torn the very fibers of unity that bind us and turned them into nothing but the memories of spaghetti carbonara shared in days of yore. Rations have been scarce, the freezer has been without frozen fruit for days, the Magic Bullet hasn't whirred into action in a week, midweek beer has not flowed, a good lunchtime sandwich shared with the boys has been all but a dream, we've been forced out of necessity to use Jordo's Cabo themed disgusting Caribbean flavored toothpaste, and worst of all, the Party Duck has turned her ever so cold shoulder as we confined her to 'Party Off' position and failed to let her stretch her wings and point her nose towards the horizon of 'Party Duck PTI: ON' optimism.

When it seemed like nothing could save us from the late February blues, Michael and I heeded the call to duty and trekked to the northen limits to find Mansuite salvation. An absolutely disgusting refusal on the part of the suite to follow the "I can't go to Fairway because..." flowchart had gone too far, and something had to be done.

As such, we walked into the cold winds in search of the very elixir that has provided the nourishment and sustenance that has come to define the figure and shape of the Mansuite man: a full throttle, healthy 8 million calorie per day diet of Fairway culinary magic.

Once again, it was meant to be, and it now is, once again. WE ARE SAVED.

Another colossal Fairway shop afforded us the forgotten luxury of a serious burger.

Behold! The Tom-Jon Canadian Extra Sharp Cheddar Cheeseburger Special with Sauteed Onions, Fried Egg, and Tomato on a Kaiser Role with a side of grilled Green Beans with garlic and special Hawaiian salt. (I also enjoyed a large and savoury fruit smoothie, not pictured) --

Its a good thing...

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The grill has roared to life,
our longing hands have weilded knife;

The cupboards once bare,
now full, no room to spare.

The Magic Bullet has whirred,
the Party Duck has stirred;

Mansuite, once sad and distraught,
now content with the food its bought--

Can lift up its arms once more,
grasp again a beer to pour,
And bring to you, our dearest friends,
all that you've counted on us for.

Famine Day 5

2009-02-25T13:40:00.015-05:00

The long hungry days have stretched into their fifth diurnal passing of the sun. We grow lethargic, the internal restlessness manifests itself in the eyes only. The exertion of more is prevented by the dearth of energy within the suite.

How have we let it come to this? A completed Hamdel gold card lays just out of reach by an overturned lamp.

If only I could--

reach--

delivery number--

I can't.

I will dedicate the last of my strength to the endeavor of creating a flowchart to divert blame. Tell the world what happened here. Tell the world my story.

With throats unslaked, with black lips baked,
We could nor laugh nor wail;
Through utter drought all dumb we stood!
I bit my arm, I sucked the blood,
And cried, Fairway! Fairway!

Origins

2009-02-24T16:51:00.002-05:00

Yesterday, we were linked to on the Bwog, which mentioned a short play about the origins of our blog. It was actually a short screenplay, reproduced here:

INT. MANSUITE COMMON ROOM - DUSK

TOM hovers over the oven while MICHAEL, JORDAN, JON, and WINSTON wait expectantly at the table. Michael is particularly enthusiastic, his napkin tucked into his shirt, his knife and fork aloft, grinning like a puppy at play.

Tom pulls a Pyrex dish out of the oven and turns, revealing it's contents. A bed of roasted potatoes and garlic awash in a piquant broth support two steaming golden birds.

TOM
Chicken's done!

JON
It was supposed to be done 20 minutes ago.
The stuffing is getting cold.

TOM
Well, it's ready now. You can't rush these things.

JON
I know, I know. Here, I'll help you cut it.

MICHAEL
I want wine.

Both Jon and Michael get up. Jon goes to the island and stands next to Tom. They both pick up knives and start to carve the meat. Michael reaches up above the refrigerator and grabs a bottle of red wine, then takes a corkscrew from the drawer. Suddenly, COLIN flies into the room on a scooter.

COLIN
Dinnertime...wooooaaah!

Colin's scooter wobbles, and he overcorrects, careening into the coffee table. He flips over and his legs fly into the air, launching the scooter toward the kitchen. It hits the island and Tom reacts with lightning quickness, moving to protect the chicken. He grabs the Pyrex and pivots away, knocking into Jon, who throws his arms up in surprise. A knife flies out of his hand towards Michael, who is just now pulling the cork from the bottle. As the knife sails forward, it slams into the cork on the corkscrew as it passes in front of Michael's body, stopping the knife mere inches from his chest. He looks down at the knife, then over to the wine bottle in his hand.

MICHAEL
I guess this stuff is good for your heart.

Tom, meanwhile, continues to rotate, and the chicken dish knocks into the wine bottle, which sails through the air spewing liquid. Winston leaps to his feet and dives across the table to grab it, which he does. Some of the wine, however splatters over the island and onto the floor near the scooter.

WINSTON
Gotcha!

JORDAN
Nice grab, eh!

Just then, Jordan sees the bowl of risotto, which Winston has knocked out of the way, teetering on the edge of the table.

JORDAN & MICHAEL
I got it!

They knock into each other. The bowl falls to the floor and the knife/cork/corkscrew in Michael's hand is dislodged. Just as Colin gets back up on the other side of the island, the contraption flies toward him and he ducks down just a moment too late. It glances off his head and arcs upward, hitting the projector, knocking it askew and flipping the power switch. It whirs to life.

There is a moment of stunned silence, then everybody slowly regains composure.

WINSTON
Is everybody alright?

COLIN
Yeah, yeah.

TOM
Chicken's good.
(beat)
That was close.

JORDAN
That was lucky.

COLIN
It may have been more lucky than we think...

JON
What do you mean?

Colin looks down at the floor.

COLIN
I think it was a sign.

Everybody leans forward to see what he sees. lying on the floor is the fallen scooter, the upturned risotto bowl, and the spilled wine which forms a curious shape. In front of all this, the beam from the projector displays a frozen frame of Gossip Girl on the floor.

MICHAEL
What? That we shouldn't ride scooters
at dinner?

COLIN
(still looking down)
No...look.

Michael is confused.

COLIN (cont.)
They're letters! The scooter makes an 'L',
the bowl is an 'O',and the wine looks like
a 'G'!

MICHAEL
Log? That doesn't make sense.

JON
What about the Gossip Girl?

They all think for a moment.

TOM
(suddenly)
It's B! On the screen...that's Blair! Her
nickname is B.

MICHAEL
B-Log? I don't get it.

Colin looks up, his face a mixture of fear and anticipation.

COLIN
Not B-Log. It spells BLOG.

SMASH TO BLACK

True Lies, signage edition

2009-02-24T15:17:00.002-05:00

Dear Columbia Dining,

Thank you for clarifying the phrase "Free Sample," it saves us the trouble of having to steal your bread rolls anyways.

Dear Fairway,

Thank you for supporting the majority of the our agricultural sector and GDP. Your business is appreciated.

Stuff and Fluff

2009-02-23T22:57:00.007-05:00

Getting ripped for Cabo is sometimes harder than you think.

Pasta alla Carbonara

2009-02-23T22:23:00.003-05:00

Ciao. Tonight's menu @ Mansuite: Pasta alla Carbonara, with a special twist.

Buono buono.

It's come to this

2009-02-23T13:56:00.004-05:00

In the famous words of Tom, "WE HAVE NO FOOD!"

Alas, my ham and cheese sandwich today is not as satisfying as usual.

We must go to fairway boys- before we starve!

Mansuite: A multi-part virtual guide

2009-02-23T13:36:00.017-05:00

Today’s segment: The Opium Den

Suite tours are available by appointment Mon – Thurs 11am-6pm
Opium Den tours are available by surprise Fri 2:46am-4:11am and Sat 3:24am-5:05am

It was the end of summer. Spots of clouds drifted by sluggishly, languishing in the last breaths of warmth and in defiance of the coming Autumn. Two weeks before the official start of school, we arrived on campus rejuvenated by the summer and ready to tackle the last best year of our lives—the climactic point from which life is a downhill slide to wives, denture glue and death.

Upon entering our suite for the first time, we scampered like kids on Christmas morning to our respective rooms to fantasize over the infinite decorating possibilities and to ceremoniously unplug our ROLM phones. ROLMs in hand, we converged in the hallway to seek out the deepest, darkest recess to which we could banish the phones and the evil autodialing alumni-relations spirits within.

As if by coincidence, we had gathered directly outside one particular door that nobody had noticed before.

Seemingly drawn by some mysterious force within, Colin approached the portal and swung it open; light spilled from the hallway seemed to be absorbed by the infinite expanse that lay within.

“Dibs!” Shouted Jon. Nobody else had the courage to contest him.

We donned our headlamps—yes, we all own headlamps—and took our first tentative steps inside. A first look at the floor suggested that either Jackson Pollack began his career here or something far more sinister had taken place.

Predating Pollack’s work by at least several years, Neolithic cave markings were scrawled across one side of the room. Deciphering these ancient characters has so far proved impossible.

And at the farthest expanse of the room we stumbled upon treasure we could not have possibly fathomed:

“What are these strange devices?” remarked Colin at the front of the expedition.

“They appear to be goggles, or some other form of protective eye covering,” answered Winston authoritatively.

“It looks like they were designed to carry things, like a bocce ball set maybe,” puzzled Tom.

“That’s nonsense. This room definitely must have been a cell of some sort and these were used to restrain people. See? They lock-- nobody would be able to undo this type of sophisticated latching mechanism,” interjected Jordan.

Everybody mumbled in agreement with this theory as we all individually concluded that we must be standing on the site of a defunct holding cell for delinquent artists. It would also do perfectly as a converted burial ground for our possessed ROLM phones. Utilizing the restraining devices to lock the earpieces to the keypads, we placed the phones in the end of the tunnel at the far end of the room.

Luckily I recalled the ancient mantra to ensure the autodialing spirits would stay entombed forever:

“Seek two bed frames, a mattress, four pairs of skis, a bicycle pump, a mini-fridge and as much cardboard as you can find. Mash them into the chamber as haphazardly as possible. Only then will the curse of the ancient relics remain at bay.”

Suffice to say, we followed these instructions to a tee.

Take Your Daughters to Sugarloaf / Shredfest

2009-02-23T12:38:00.009-05:00

This past weekend, Mansuite was able to send only two representatives up north to Sugarloaf for the first Ski Team overnighter. Despite the disadvantage of playing four men down, Michael and I were able to start a family and a new life in Maine. It only took us a couple of minutes to produce four daughters. See below.

Dad, Dad, and the kids.

With our new household sturdily in place, all of society's nuclear family demands fell immediately to the wayside and we were able to charge the mountain with an air of confidence that only comes with the comfort of knowing you have a family waiting for you back at your rental condo. The result: action shots ---

Carve

Shred

Addendum: Partial list of beards honored in during the beard game on the bus home--

The beards of...

Tom Selleck,
The Pringles Guy
Robert E. Lee
Odysseus
Captain Hook
Jordan Keenan
ZZ Top
Confucious

Long distance relationships - Part 2

2009-02-22T13:06:00.009-05:00

I was also absent this weekend, on an excursion to Harvard. Officially, I was traveling with Fruit Paunch to attend an improv festival, but secretly I wanted to see how Harvard housing matched up to the Mansuite!

Luckily, I got a chance to stay at the legendary* Mather House. What a wonderful opportunity for comparison!!

The first thing I noticed upon entering the lounge were the colorful banners adorning the walls. They gave the room an exotic flair, and I reckon if you're not going to paint your suite, this is a pretty good way to go. It did make me wonder, with all the walls covered, where they projected their movies, but my curiosity didn't last long. Spotting a small television on one side of the room, it dawned on me slowly and painfully that this room had no projector!!!

Well that was quite a blow, and I had to sit down to collect myself. Good fortune! The couch was firm but comfortable (and unlike our own sadly short sofas, capable of fitting a fully recumbent man), and in its warm embrace I begin to look more favorably on the lounge that would be my one-night roost.

Sure it was small, but it was a junior residence, after all. And it seemed the inhabitants were crimson mavericks: a safety inspection report taped to the door indicated that the Mather men had audaciously blocked a fire exit!

Their reputation was upheld that evening when they hosted an unregistered party for us (how they knew it was party time without a PartyDuck Party Time Indicator I'll never understand). Though low-key, the party was highly fun, and when we finally called it a night (around 4 to 2—we were pretty tired) we all slept soundly.

I enjoyed Mather, but it was nice to return home. Many thanks to our hosts; I encourage you all to come visit the Mansuite before the semester is out!

*In the 1986 film "The Legend of Mather House," a band of cocksass Harvard freshman, unwilling to wait four years to join a finals club and get laid, decide to turn their dorm into a love den in the hopes of scoring more immediate gratification. "Players can't be choosers," was the tagline, and the plot, though haphazard, was riddled with hijinx and hickeys. Perhaps most notably, it featured several cameos. Tom Cruise, Sigourney Weaver, and Ron Howard all appeared in the film, and a young Renee Zellweger was even decapitated!

Quiet time

2009-02-22T12:42:00.003-05:00

So much of Mansuite is gone. It's so quiet. Strange...

Hurry home boys.

Long distance relationships

2009-02-21T16:27:00.002-05:00

Dear Manauite,

I hope you are enjoying New York! Maine is nice, Tom and I have
started a family together. I hope this doesn't complicate our
relationship at all.

I had an idea: after the matching robes, can we get team ski
jumpsuits? I liked this one in the ~~life~~liftline today; note the guy
getting whapped in the crotch: